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...i am a princess on the way to my throne...

2.28.2005

The Shire Review Issue Two 

Well, folks, it's finally here: the long awaited Shire Review: Issue Two!

The subject? The Oscars!

The Shire Review

I've been asked when Rosie is planning on giving her report on the Oscars. She was going to complete it this afternoon, but I think it's more likely it will be in the morning. After reading The Shire's report, she's about Oscared out!

Ta for now!

Feeling:creative
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2.25.2005

Tea Time With Rosie 

Rosie now has her very own web site! Woohoo!

I'm so happy for my little alter-ego.:)

Tea Time With Rosie

She says she has to get her links and notify list worked out, but everything else is ready to go. She also told me she's putting a fire under the bottoms of the Shire Review to release another entry, and with the Oscars around the corner I have a feeling it's going to be open season on Hollywood courtesy of Middle Earth.

I can't wait.:)
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2.23.2005

It Came! It Finally Came! 

My beloved Spring Fairy is here! She's actually here! Woohoo!!

I first saw her last Friday, and fell so head over heals for her that I promptly placed a Priority Mail order with Paw Prints. I know Priority only takes 2-3 business days, so I waited all weekend in aniticipation, salivating at the thought of all her lovliness.

Until I found out...Monday was President's Day which meant no mail.

Who came up with that shingidg??? No mail??? Didn't the government know I was waiting for a beloved parcel that would enable me to begin stitching one of the most gorgeous designs I've ever beheld? Didn't they realize they were depriving a decent, hardworking citizen the time of chill-ment and fulfillment? Didn't they know?? Didn't they care?????

Needless to say, this news was broken to me while I was on the phone with Angi and Misty on that very Monday, so they got to clean up the mess of my bitter disappointment.

And then came Tuesday...oh, what a Happy Day!

I had almost given up hope that she would arrive, because I checked the mail around 2pm and all that the box beheld was a magazine and two stale little ad cards. I shuffled back to the house, dejected and folorn, only to hear the mail truck zoom in at 5pm with my package in tow! (It would seem the stale mail was left over from Saturday, the day we forgot to check the box). I swept down on the mail box like a crazed harpy after a scrap of meat, retreiving the precious parcel in utter delight. Clutching the package to my bosom, I ran inside and tore it open, only to ooh and ahh at the blue eyed beauty and frantically search for the floss list.

Well. I am, indeed, smitten.

I started stitching her last night on Morning Dew Belfast by Silkweavers, of which I will leave a decent portion of the fabric showing when framed to serve as the mat. Changes will be as follows:

1) Sky blue sparklies added to the eyes and head jewel.

2) Opal sparklies added to the white flowers in her garland and butterfly.

3) Sunburst sparlkies added to her shoulder to give the illusion of a glitter mesh gown.

Other than that, everything stays the same!

I think what surprised me the most was the clarity of the chart. It's only four pages, and you can actually "see" the figure in the pattern. While it's true there are over 90 colors alloted for the piece, there are enough block areas so it doesn't feel like it's confetti city every where you stitch. It's going to be a true pleasure to stitch, that much is for certain.

And, just so you know what is going to be monopolizing my time over the next four years, may I present the Spring beauty and her illustrious sisters:

Spring Fairy


Autumn Fairy


Summer Fairy


Winter Fairy


Gorgeous. Absolutley gorgeous.:)

Feeling:festive!
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2.22.2005

Fresh Air and an Olive Branch 

I've thought long and hard about this, and I want to share something with you. I have seriously considered closing this blog and leaving the community, mainly because something I resolved in myself would not seem to be resolved in others. I thought it might be the easier thing to do, to just remove myself from the fray. I have no problem admitting when I am wrong, and I can eat my humble-pie with the best of them; I just do not need it force fed to me by others.

However, on second thought, I realized that I do not want to go. I've made some wonderful, dear friends, and I would miss these people very much if I totally cut off contact. I would also be depriving myself of elements I dearly love, and I am not ready to do that. I enjoy writing and I enjoy stitching, and I enjoy sharing these things with all of you. So: I'm not going anywhere.

What I am going to do, however, is keep myself from any kind of negativity, whether it be on a blog or on the boards. I find with my heightened sensitivity I cannot trust myself to act rationally, and it would behoove me to ignore the things that could spark negativity within myself. While I do not take credit for (nor do I control) the reactions and choices of others, I do take credit for and control my own. I cannot flourish into the person I want to be while immersing myself in rants and vents (whether they be my own or others), as I have found out the hard way. I also cannot expect for things to just be "let go" when I admit my mistakes, for there is always someone who wishes to hold on to them. I do not believe prolonging the discussion of a situation is healthy, and the only reason I do it here and now is to lead up to what I am about to share with you.

So...Here is what I am going to do. No more negative reading, regardless of who wrote it or where it is written. I want to remain blissfully ignorant and clueless of who says what about who and who is dishing who behind the scenes; I want nothing to do with that. I want to see everyone in a good light, and I want to get back that wide-eyed innocence of when I was a newbie. I want to hug everyone and kiss them and tell them I love them and mean it. Since I am the only one who can control what I think and do, I feel this is the best choice and one I willingly make.

A new start. A fresh outlook. Fresh Air. I need to do this. I don't want anymore hurt feelings, misunderstandings, or venting. Not for me. Not for others.

There. All is said and done, and I pray only healing and goodness will follow. Would anyone care to join me? After all, I think we all could use a little healing and goodness, don't you?

BTW: As far as that "good news" I mentioned yesterday? Well, it's not that I'm pregnant (of which seemed to be the speculation!).
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2.21.2005

Monday Morning Blechs 

I'm really tired. It has been a very long, very horrible week. I'm really hoping this week will be better. I thought I would wake up refreshed and rejuvenated, but I don't feel that way at all. I feel restless, unfocused, and completely burned out. I seem to be putting my foot in it everywhere I go.

For the first time in a while, I don't really know what to do. I truly don't know if I have the energy to deal with the pressure. I'm praying for God to carry me at this moment, for as an infant I cannot walk on my own. I wish I had been created to just let things 'go', but as I look around me at the floors that have not been mopped/the bathrooms that have not been cleaned/the carpet that has not been vacuumed/the laundry that has not been washed and I could just cry. I try and try and try, and yet I can't seem to stay on top of it. Couple that with a week from hell and you can imagine the state my house is in. I thrive in things neat, tidy, and organized, and yet I have to work my tail off to keep things that way. And trust me, I am not talking Martha Stewart clean, but just the bare minimum clean that keeps me scrubbing. I wish I had been created with the natural inclination for organizing and cleaning, but it takes me a lot of work and effort and I don't want to spend my waking days being miserable because the house is not as it should be.

On the flip side, I have some really exciting news that I can't share at the moment but I may be able to in the near future. It's one of those kind of wonderful things that comes out of the blue when you least expect it, and it's been the one shining light I've had this week.

And I think we've all been due for a little shining light to come our way.

Do you know what I may do? I may use this 'stitching' blog to actually write about, you know, stitching. I just seem too weary for anything else. Of course, knowing me and my penchant to just talk I'm sure I'll have to sneak in some other subjects here and there. But there are some things, for sanity's sake, that I will stay far away from and those subjects are as follows:

1) Controversy: I've had my belly full of it. You want controversy? Go read the Enquirer.

2) What Lies Within: I've been burned too many times by my mouth. It is not going to happen anymore, jack, not if I can help it!

3) Picasso: well, okay, not really. I may discuss Picasso here and there, but I find his stuff highly overrated. Sorry.

What you will *not* see on this list, however, is the Most Annoying Celebrities Ever found on the guise of Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, and occasionally Madonna. Although it will all be in love, if there is an article on these ladies that I find worthy of bashing-er-critiquing then I will do so without abandon.

Hmm, so we won't have Picasso but we will have Paris...I'm not sure what that says about me or my blog, but frankly I don't want to know...

Post script: I had a misunderstanding. I admitted that. We've talked and everything, to my knowledge, is worked out and is fine. Can we all please let it go?
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2.19.2005

A Very Loooooooooong Week 

It has been a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooog week and I'm glad it's nearly ovah!

I got a call from Valerie and the Georgia Ghetto Floss Lickers today. I wasn't able to go the Nashville Night at Norwood Niche, the LNS in Rome, but Ginny graciously got me a couple of new releases I've been wanting. I got to speak to everyone on the phone and I've already cleared my calendar for the March 12th GTG. Woohoo! I can't wait!

There is not much I have to say today except this: sometimes apologies are meaningless. They are always necessary, but not everyone accepts them. All they do is use them for a reason to get righteously indignant. Fine. I can live with that. I know I've made mistakes and had misunderstandings. I just find it ironic that the wronged party is the only one who can rant and rave and be "approved" to do so. Well, I suppose people do whatever helps them sleep better at night.

All in all, I don't what has been going around the stitching community lately. It seems we've all had a major case of PMS (except perhaps Charlie, but having a wife and grown daughter makes him no stranger to the havoc PMS can have on a woman's mind, I am sure). We have all splintered into our own little factions, something I supposed could not really be helped. I really had no idea how blasted snarky some personalities could be in the stitching world, but I suppose no community is without them. Since last October I've seen snarkiness on the boards and in blogs, and I've seen people get mad as wet hens when called on it. Frankly, if you don't want people to think your snarky, then don't make snarky remarks (and I've been the author of a snark or two, so I can say that without malice). Then again, if it really doesn't bother you, then snark away! I guess that's life. On another note, I used to want to know who sent hate mail to other stitches, but now I'm not so sure; I like my naivitee that all stitchers are really decent hoooomans deep down inside.

Oh, well. After all is said and done, you gotta love each other!:)

BTW, folks: I am not bad mouthing M. There was more to it than that, and for her part I admitted to my misunderstanding. Everything is cool. I just thought some of you needed to know that. And just for clarification: today's post has nothing to do with her but a conversation I had with a friend. I just thought you wanted to know that as well.:)

Have a wonderful evening, everyone! See you on Monday!

Feeling:contemplative
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2.18.2005

Completely and Utterly In Love 

Oh.My.Goodness.Gracious.Mushrooms.

I've seen it. I'm inspired. My muse has arrived and in her I find enchantment.

Behold the breath of Spring:
Spring Fairy by Character Creations

Rarely have I beheld something so beautiful. I *will* drop every project I have for her, I *will* be diligent and not let her fall to the wayside, I *won't* let her become a UFO, and I *will* finish her.

I am smitten. I am twiterpated. I have gone to the Caribbean and am singing "Calypso". I don't know if I will ever come back.

Bet you didn't know cross stitch could be this exhilerating...

Feeling:deep in love
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2.17.2005

A Drama Queen After All 

Well. Well well well well well.

Double well.

If there was a toe cheese award, I would be the recipient.

You know all my ranting and raving a couple of days ago? It was all a mistake. Yep, you guessed it; a big fat gnarly ugly stupid dreadful misunderstanding. I am terribly embarrassed. It seems I spent the better part of last night feasting on a meal of crow and humble pie, and here you see me at breakfast with a healthy dose of egg on my face.

Sigh. These things happen. You would think I would stop and listen to my husband's advice once in a while instead of going off like a sawed off shotgun, but one day I'll learn that maybe he's clued in more than I give him credit for. Of course, you'd think if I would slow down and learn how to read then perhaps 90% of this wouldn't have happened, but hey, cut me some slack. I need new glasses.

Anyway, it's over and everybody is happy once again. Despite my sheepishness over the whole mess, I have to say in some ways I'm glad it happened. If it didn't, I may never had my epiphany and personal growth may not have occurred. Although I feel extremely silly about the whole thing, I can honestly say I feel the wiser for it, and we can always benefit from a little more wisdom.

In an ironic twist of events, my little cat has diarrhea again; somehow I find that oddly appropriate.

After wallowing in my sea of humility after the afore mentioned events, I decided to change my template and give the ever-lofty, ever-aloof, ever-chic Haldir a break from the masses and send him back to Lothlorien for a while. I have replaced him with a pod of rather cheeky dolphins, painted only as the wonderful Royce McClure can paint them. I have been sorely missing the ocean, a place I have not lived since I was seven years old. Sometimes something just gets in your blood and refuses to let go. In many ways I'm a bit of an oxymoron (moron being the operative word) where the ocean is concerned; I'm terrified of it and don't think I could swim in it, and yet it's mysterious beauty draws me as a moth to a flame. I cannot think of anything on this earth more beautiful, save the faces of my children. Robert once asked me in curiosity what is was about dolphins that attracted me so, and after thinking about it I replied, "Because through them I see God."

Wow. Can it really get better than that?

Feeling:like a boil on the buttcheek of humanity
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2.16.2005

Regrets and Knee-Jerk Reactions 

You know, I knew I would regret yesterday's entry.

After re-reading it this morning, I saw how unfruitful it was and I'm sorry for it. Whether or not someone has a problem with me is not the point; it's my reaction that counts. Of course, that is the crux of this whole mess and why I've cut back on the boards in the first place. I've had a difficult time maintaining a balance, and because of that I've been quick to assume and slow to reason. The truth is, I've taken someone else's problem and made it my problem, and then by proxy of my entry I've made it everyone else's problem. I did not stop to "listen" to what was really going on but just jumped in head first and came up sputtering.

And while I didn't end up crying after all, I did end up stewing, which can be worse.

I've also learned a little something about myself and that is perhaps I hold myself up on a pedestal. I expect a certain type of behavoir for myself, and I've worked very hard at it over the past five years to execute that behavoir. Whenever I have a meltdown (kinda like yesterday, hmm?) nothing but blech comes from it and I instantly regret it. I am my worst critic and my worse source for misunderstandings. I am harder on myself than anyone else, but that is because I take the "Do Unto Others" mantra extremely seriously. If I fail at whatever my expectation for myself is for the day, then I berate myself. The way I see it, Christ didn't die and rise again for me so I can go around smearing poop on people's faces, no indeed. There are enough people out there willing to be Poop-Meisters without my adding to the fray. I am supposed to be salt and light, not vinegar and darkness.

So, with that in mind, I do apologize for my freak out yesterday. I appreciate that so many people extended their arms to me and I love you all for it. The truth, however, is that I should have just chilled out and not let it bother me. People are certainly entitled to believe what they choose, and I honestly do not hold anyone ill will over it. As a matter of fact, when I was stitching the instanity known as Summer Queen last night (my personal method of self-punishment) I actually felt calm and at peace. It was as if this revelation stuck for the first time. I've always wanted people to like me and approve of me, to the point of where I would get physically ill if they didn't. But last night, it was as if a massive lightbulb finally blinked on and the ephiphany was as follows: Hello!! Not everyone has to approve of what you do or think, you know! It's okay for them not to like you or what you do! You'll live! Ya see??? I'm your epiphany here!! Are you getting this, chiquita?

Well. I finally get it. After 36 years, I think I finally get it. That is not to say I won't still get hurt or be disappointed (or even have a flake out or two), but it is to say that you all have something in print to point me to when these things do happen to say, "See, Prin? You 'got' it once, you can 'get' it again!"

And you know, the truth is that there are people dealing with real problems that make mine so pale in comparison. There's Angi, my dear sweet Angi, who wrestles with finances and a brilliant but special needs child every day of her life. There is Melissa, whose beloved father is terminally ill. There's Sherry, who is approaching the anniversary of the miscarriage of a very much wanted child. And there's Haze, whose dealing with a young grandaughter and an uncertain future. I could go on and on, but we all know someone with an issue that is cause for great concern. It makes my post yesterday seem so petty.

I just wanted you all to know this. I felt it was important to share these things with you and let you know that, for once, I feel free. Free to be me and free to let others be themselves, whether they agree with me or even "like" me. It won't change what I believe or who I am or what I say, but it may give me a little inner peace.

And couldn't we all use a little peace now and then?

Mah mood:turning over a new leaf
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2.15.2005

What.Ever. 

Okay, I'm furious. If you don't want to start your day with bile spewed all over your freshly starched blouse, then cease reading. If you are up to some good old fashioned ranting, then by all means carry on.

It has been brought to my attention that my "leaving" the Just Plain Chat Board was considered a dramatic "swan song" and that my behavoir on other boards since has been nothing short of deplorable. HUH???? I don't know what boards some of you are reading, but if you are reading deplorable behavoir you are not reading it from me, jack! You know, I'm not going to rehash why I left, but I will say this: would it have made you happier if I had just dropped off the face of the earth without so much as a goodbye, or stating any reasons why I was doing so?? And if you had taken time to read my reasons for leaving, you would have seen that it was because of ME that I left, not because of others! I could not control myself in the Heated Debates forum, so I decided to leave as not to offend the other participants. What part of this is so hard to understand?? No, I DO NOT hate anyone over there...as a matter of fact, I love them and I miss them, and when I can maintain an element of self control over matters of abortion and the murder of the handicapped young then perhaps I will go back, but the fact that I've been made into some sort of "not-nice-as-she-pretended-to-be" kind of diva just astounds me. Yes, I responded harshly to one of the threads in question, and if memory serves I also apologized for it to the entire board. Yep, that sure sounds like the acts of a prima donna to me!

I did say once on another board that I was more comfortable somewhere else because of the policial leanings. I always felt that the JPC board leaned a little more to the left than where I sit, but I see even a comment like that can be taken completely out of proportion. Fine. Think whatever you want, friend.

As far as my conduct on other boards, it has been the same as it always was. I have not been nasty/vile/rude/whatever blah blah blah. End of story. If you need further verification then go read them yourself. I openly post and the Chatelaine Board and the Wagon, and lurk at XS2XCESS and Mirabilia with the occassional post. Go on. Do your homework. I have even, you will be shocked to know, lurked the past two days at Just Plain Chat to see how everyone is, but now I'm glad I haven't posted. I'm now afraid I would only get a "you-stupid-swan-songing-diva-you-aren't-welcome-anymore-because-you-are-really-not-as-nice-as-you-seemed" kind of response.

And one more thing: if you don't think I'm really the person you thought I was, then perhaps you had me way too high on some sort of pedestal. I don't walk on water, you know. I'm going to have some bad moments, even regretful ones. I've tried to be consistent in all my dealings with everyone, and when I say things I mean them. I'm not false, I'm not fake, and you can rest assured what I say to someone is what I mean. I'm also not perfect, something I have admitted repeatedly over and over in this very blog. If my behavoir does fall short of what I deem appropriate, I am the first to call myself on it and I am my harshest critic. What you may have seen as a drama-queen's departure I saw as a chance to give myself and everyone else a break because I WAS THE PROBLEM. Yes, things were not healthy for me, but I was ticking people off left and right, so I thought they would be happier if I left. I have cried tears of anguish over this, and if you don't believe it then it just too blasted bad.

Enough. I'm off to cry my eyes out. Sometimes I wish I had never discovered the on line stitching world, and other times I don't know what I would do without it. And, to make matters worse, I know I am going to look at this entry later and absolutely hate it. However, I promised myself when I started this blog that is would be a place to be real and honest, and right now I'm being about as real as it gets.
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A Cat's Tale 

When the Good Lord above created me, He installed within my soul a genuine love for animals, especially felines, and especially the felines known as the domestic cat.

Well, needless to say He created a monster.

When people look at me, they see a cat lover. When cats look at me, they see SUCKER branded smartly on my pale forehead that begins to glow when the sun sets gently in the horizon. At least, that is what my latest addition saw when he came barreling towards me from across the street, mewing loud enough to get my attention and satisfy his inner-Siamese.

What could I do? I was doomed. As soon as I saw this small, solid black cat lacing itself between my legs and heard it's urgent purr, I knew we had to adopt him (or, if truth be told, he adopted us). Even Robert was instantly smitten. He agreed that if the cat was still around after we came back out (we were visiting my parents) that we would take him with us. It was obvious he was a stray, and barely seven months old. He needed a home, and although we needed another cat like we needed holes in our heads we took him with us to add to the three we already had.

This was a week ago. Let's flash foward to Valentine's Day morning when I awoke to cat diarrhea *everywhere*, and I mean *everywhere*. In the bathroom. In the kitchen. In the hallway. In the living room. In the dining room. On the couch. Pick a room, and it was there. The little black cat (whom we named Julius) had been neutered and de-wormed several days before, and had had a little bit of diarrhea over that past few days but had seemed to be improving. I had planned on taking him to the vet that Monday morning, but never in my life did I expect to wake up to YUCK everywhere. It took me so long to clean it up that my son had to miss his Valentine's Day party at school. It's bad enough when your child has diarrhea, but when your cat has it it's positively disgusting. The one saving grace, however, is that it did not smell. Nope, not one bit. For those of you who don't believe in God, you might want to reconsider because I am convinced that is the only reason why my cat's you-know-what didn't stink to high heaven. Even the Lord didn't want to deal with that kind of smell! When I told all the vet people about it's lack of odor, they looked at me wide mouthed as if they couldn't believe it, but I take it as a mercy blessing; the Lord knew I couldn't deal with the mess if I had to deal with the smell as well. And who says miracles have to be huge to be miracles? The Red Sea can't be parted all the time, you know.

Anyway, back to the story; I bundle cat and kids in the van and sweep off to the vet in hopes of a cure, or at the very least a plug for one very drippy kitty butt. Once there, he is weighed and temp taken, to which we see he is normal and has gained a pound in little less than a week (okay, so at least he's eating!). He's not exhibiting signs of a sick animal other than the crap-fest that's been going on over the past few days, so the doc gives him some suspension for cociddia (a teeny one was found in his stool sample, so it's better to be safe than sorry!) and some very good, very pricey wet food. She suggests I keep him in the bathroom until his *quote*projectile diarrhea*end quote* goes away. Blecggggggh. What a way to put it, but I suppose it was accurate.

Well, I kept him in the bathroom for the rest of the day and fed him the 'good stuff', only to find he had two little bouts yesterday afternoon but none during the night. I let him out this morning to join the rest of us, and he was very happy about this; that is, until I tried to force-feed him his medicine. Ever tried to give an unwilling cat something he doesn't want to have? Trust me when I say you come out of the experience the worse for wear. He ended up with more medicine in his coat than in his belly and my hair standing on end. I'm surprised I didn't break out into a sweat after the trussel. Maybe I ought to contact the World Wrestling Federation and see if they have "Giving Cats Medicinal formulas or Vitamins" and enter Julius, because whoever went against him wouldn't stand a chance. I'd be rich after the first match.

The upside to this whole story (assuming you are still reading) is that Julius seems to be feeling better. The downside is that Meow Mix doesn't seem to cut the mustard and I may have to shell out a lot more money for better quality cat food. If I had just one little stinky-butt cat it wouldn't even be an issue, but I have in addition to him three much older, much larger male cats that like their tucker and a lot of it. I don't know how they are going to go for any new frou-frou designer cat chow, but they just may have to suck it up and deal. I just hope I can afford it, for when all is said and done my fuzzbutts are certainly worth it.

Now: go kiss your furbaby and thank God it doesn't have diarrhea. And if it does, then pray to God that it won't stink...

Feeling:shady lady
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2.12.2005

Happy Early Valentine's Day! 

Yes, my Freaky Darlings, I am back and my blog is all dolled up for Valentine's Day!
And, no, all you Legoli-fans, I'm not going to be displaying the ever snobby-ever-cool Haldir forever, but for now you just have to deal.

There is sooooooooooo much to tell since last I've blogged, but I will have to come back and indulge you later today. All of my spare time was spent tinkering with the new logo and background (which all took longer to make than I thought. I'm such a perfecionist!). There were also a couple of blinkies for a certain Weather Goddess I had to finalize, and now I find myself with two children wanting lunch and a cat box begging to be cleaned. Ah, such is the life of a suburban house frau.

And I wouldn't change it for all the high-life living in the world.

So, without further ado, I will see you all later this afternoon. Come prepared with a cup of your favorite beveage, comfy slippers, and some cookies for me. C'ya soon!

Mah mood:glad to be back
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