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...i am a princess on the way to my throne...

5.22.2005

A Heartfelf Thank You 

I don't know if it's because I'm still upset about having to miss the Georgia GTG yesterday, or if it's because I'm catching a nasty cold, or if it's just from the general roller coaster I've been on lately, but I'm feeling terribly emotional today. It may also be because I found a folder in my e-mail titled "BOLO", from which I placed the flood of e-mails I got last year when my son went missing.

I was overwhelmed with awe for the sheer love I felt from the stitching and non-stitching community alike. I cannot express to everyone how much I truly love them. How short sighted of me to forget the emmense support I recieved during that time! You all were so wonderful, and with each and every letter that I read my heart nearly broke for the incredible love I felt towards my family. It was a tremendously stressful time for me, but I realize it was not just me that felt that stress, but also all of you who shared that time with me. I love you all more than I can possibly say.

To each and every one of you...Thank You. I Truly Love You.
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5.19.2005

I Miss You All 

I don't really know where to begin, but I just wanted everyone to know how much I miss them.

I've been active on a couple of boards lately, so I haven't been a hermit all the way around, although I've been getting some friendly flack at the neglect of my blog, and I promise I will try to do better. The desire to write just has been a bit absent lately. It seems like things recently have exploded that have left me feeling vunerable and, if I may say so, a bit depressed.

O, where to start?

1) There is a 98% chance our best friends will be moving to Texas to become the ministers of music in one of our churches. It is a fabulous opportunity for them, but I am devestated. I do not know how I am going to survive their move. My husband and I have grown very close to Russ and Jenna very fast, and the thought of them leaving crushes me. Last night in church I could barely hold it together, because all I could do is look around and imagine what it will be like with them not there. Not only are they our best friends, but they are an extremely prominant part of the church and their leaving will indeed leave a huge hole. I'm trying not to be selfish, but I will miss them so.

2) Teresa Wentzler is temporarily retiring from needlework designing to persue a career in fine arts. While I think it's wonderful she is doing what she wants to do (and as an artist I can totally relate to her desire to branch out) it makes me very, very sad. Someone on one of the needlework boards said it felt like the end of an era, and that is exactly how it feels. I hate change, but I acknowledge that it's necessary for growth. I just don't like experiencing it.

3) I've been doing more artwork, and while that is great on the surface it kind of wreaks havoc on my emotions. Let me explain: whenever I paint, I transfer a bit of myself on the canvas. It leaves me in a bit of an emotional, vunerable state, one which adds to my sensitivity. Since I've been doing so much artwork lately, I've been very "open" to the things around me, the good and bad, and it has affected me more deeply than usual. I don't know if other artists can relate to what I am saying, or if I'm just a total freak, but either way it's made for an interesting couple of weeks.

4) I'm tired of being fat, and I'm doing something about it. I just wish it didn't take so looooooong!

Sorry for the whines, but I just wanted to fill you all in a bit on the deal. For the most part things are fine, but I'm just coping. I guess everyone is entitled to just 'cope' once in a while. I've been praying, but to be honest I feel like my prayers are hitting the ceiling. I know God is listening, but for whatever reason I'm discouraged.

Yeesh...I hate it when I get like this. I think I'll go stitch on a TW in honor of her career change and meditate on the Word for a while.
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