...i am a princess on the way to my throne...



Okay, I'm furious. If you don't want to start your day with bile spewed all over your freshly starched blouse, then cease reading. If you are up to some good old fashioned ranting, then by all means carry on.

It has been brought to my attention that my "leaving" the Just Plain Chat Board was considered a dramatic "swan song" and that my behavoir on other boards since has been nothing short of deplorable. HUH???? I don't know what boards some of you are reading, but if you are reading deplorable behavoir you are not reading it from me, jack! You know, I'm not going to rehash why I left, but I will say this: would it have made you happier if I had just dropped off the face of the earth without so much as a goodbye, or stating any reasons why I was doing so?? And if you had taken time to read my reasons for leaving, you would have seen that it was because of ME that I left, not because of others! I could not control myself in the Heated Debates forum, so I decided to leave as not to offend the other participants. What part of this is so hard to understand?? No, I DO NOT hate anyone over there...as a matter of fact, I love them and I miss them, and when I can maintain an element of self control over matters of abortion and the murder of the handicapped young then perhaps I will go back, but the fact that I've been made into some sort of "not-nice-as-she-pretended-to-be" kind of diva just astounds me. Yes, I responded harshly to one of the threads in question, and if memory serves I also apologized for it to the entire board. Yep, that sure sounds like the acts of a prima donna to me!

I did say once on another board that I was more comfortable somewhere else because of the policial leanings. I always felt that the JPC board leaned a little more to the left than where I sit, but I see even a comment like that can be taken completely out of proportion. Fine. Think whatever you want, friend.

As far as my conduct on other boards, it has been the same as it always was. I have not been nasty/vile/rude/whatever blah blah blah. End of story. If you need further verification then go read them yourself. I openly post and the Chatelaine Board and the Wagon, and lurk at XS2XCESS and Mirabilia with the occassional post. Go on. Do your homework. I have even, you will be shocked to know, lurked the past two days at Just Plain Chat to see how everyone is, but now I'm glad I haven't posted. I'm now afraid I would only get a "you-stupid-swan-songing-diva-you-aren't-welcome-anymore-because-you-are-really-not-as-nice-as-you-seemed" kind of response.

And one more thing: if you don't think I'm really the person you thought I was, then perhaps you had me way too high on some sort of pedestal. I don't walk on water, you know. I'm going to have some bad moments, even regretful ones. I've tried to be consistent in all my dealings with everyone, and when I say things I mean them. I'm not false, I'm not fake, and you can rest assured what I say to someone is what I mean. I'm also not perfect, something I have admitted repeatedly over and over in this very blog. If my behavoir does fall short of what I deem appropriate, I am the first to call myself on it and I am my harshest critic. What you may have seen as a drama-queen's departure I saw as a chance to give myself and everyone else a break because I WAS THE PROBLEM. Yes, things were not healthy for me, but I was ticking people off left and right, so I thought they would be happier if I left. I have cried tears of anguish over this, and if you don't believe it then it just too blasted bad.

Enough. I'm off to cry my eyes out. Sometimes I wish I had never discovered the on line stitching world, and other times I don't know what I would do without it. And, to make matters worse, I know I am going to look at this entry later and absolutely hate it. However, I promised myself when I started this blog that is would be a place to be real and honest, and right now I'm being about as real as it gets.
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