Hey beloved ones,

I just wanted to let you all know what's been going on with me. There have been some concerns, and I really appreciate those, and I figured it's time to come clean.

I'm not doing well. Don't worry, it's nothing life threateneing, but the chronic back problems I've been having are getting worse. Most of the time I'm alright, but the medicine I'm on keep me pretty drugged feeling. I've also been having some serious anxiety attacks, brought on by the lethargy and resulting procrastination. I've never had serious anxiety attacks before, but frankly they scare the tar out of me when they happen. I've been trying to get my walk with Christ more focused, as He is truly the most constant thing in my life.

This has been going on a long time, but I have not wanted to share it on this blog, for personal reasons. I've tried to keep things light, and focus mainly on my artwork, knitting, stitching, and general going ons. I've been staying away from the internet a lot, even to the point where my own board, the Mirabilia Bulletin Board, has suffered. As a result, I have surrendered ownership to that board to another due to the fact that I just can't keep up with the responsibilites. And the worst thing about it is that I've let this go too long. I should have been up front with everyone on what was happening, but as usual I jumped the shark. Ah, well, such is life.

I don't know if this blog will stay open or not. I have not enjoyed updating in a long time. I feel like everything is changing within me, and I need to focus on more spiritual things, for my own sanity. God is the major factor in my life, and I've let Him linger in the dark for long enough. I need to trust Him for my healing, for the doctors kind of know what's going on with my back, but no one is really sure.

You have all been so dear to me. I was thinking back the other day about the old Teresa Wentlzer Bulletin Board, and how we were all so tight. I love all the other boards, but that was probably the best time in my stitching life. There are so many stitchers I have not seen from those days, and in my melancholoy I am missing them. Of course, giving up the Mira board is doing its share to depress me, but it needed to be done. It wasn't fair to the stitchers. And I guess it was vanity that kept me from spilling my guts out about this sooner; I've always been "bouncy, cheery Prin" to people and I just hated the thought of seeming gloomy.

I may post here again, I just don't know. To be honest, I probably will. This is my blog and despite the past couple of years I love it. But for right now, I'm on hiatus, at least until my head and heart clears a little bit.

Until that time, I want to thank you all for reading Fully Caffeinated and Armed with Chocolate.

God Bless,
Stacey
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10.05.2007

what a friday